So I told you last week, that in honor of this cleansing month, I'm sharing some dating stories that I've been avoiding. Last week I told you about my 'it's complicated' relationship with an architect I still speak to, and today I'm going to tell you about the guy I dated right after that first went south. I decided to get back into the game soon after things fizzled for a minute, because what helps you get over a crush better than a new one? I'd love to know, so if you have that answer, feel free to leave a comment, or shoot me an email. Anyways I met him on OkCupid, he was 35 (apparently I like my men like a like my wine, a bit aged and pretty dry), cute, and into sailing. Sounded like a good change of pace.
Almost a year ago to date, he invited me to a yacht club to watch America's Cup for our first meeting. Not as fancy as it sounds, I promise. We met halfway and biked over, and I got a good vibe. He was super nice and easy going, so I wasn't nervous. We made it to the yacht club, which was pretty vacant aside from a few much older men watching the race. Until his sister showed up, and then I was nervous... I tried to keep my cool, but in my head I was kind of flipping out. I had been on enough OkCupid dates to know that I would never invite anyone I knew to a first date, especially not a family member. Never. I still can't believe he took that leap of faith. She was also nice, so it could've been a lot worse, but still... awkward. After the races ended, his sailing buddy and mentor invited us out on his sailboat, which kind of redeemed the whole 'sister showing up on the first date' situation. I had only been on a sailboat once prior, so it was exciting and kind of fun seeing him in his element. Although the day involved a lot of meeting all of his closest comrades and family members, I survived, and with very little fermented assistance. Talk about pressure.
Our next date we met up for lunch during the week. There was some sort of bomb scare at the Del Taco (my guess is some kid got stoned and forgot his backpack) so traffic was blocked up on Lincoln and I was 20 minutes late. So I waltzed in all frazzled and didn't really snap out of it because I knew I would be just as late getting back to work. Lunch was ok, but I was sweating and sparks weren't flying. So at this point we were two dates in and still no kiss, so I decided to sign up for round 3. I invited him to go to a free movie on the pier- I brought sandwiches and told him to bring the booze. If you want to know a quick and easy way to a man's heart, the answer is sandwiches- and I make really bomb sandwiches. The third date was a lot of fun. We ate and drank on the beach and kind of watched the movie. There was a band that played after, so we stayed to dance, and that's when the first kiss happened. Romance at it's cheesiest, but I didn't hate it.
We hung out a lot last October- went to a friend's show in West Hollywood, I cooked for him at my place a few times, we bar hopped and played pool... we were having fun. When it comes to dating, I typically date guys for a month or 2+ years, without much in between. I've never had one of those 6 month relationships- it's either very short or very long and I'm not sure why. It seems as soon as things heat up, I either run or I dive right in. With this guy I was teetering between the two, and after much debate and deliberation, decided to invite him to my birthday party, which was a Korean BBQ dinner with all of my closest friends. This was the first time I'd introduced an online date to my circle of friends, so it was a big step. He volunteered to drive and when he stopped by to pick me up, he brought a gift- a pink toolbox. It was super sweet, but just as frightening. Something about it screamed commitment and I got scared. We went to dinner, and the entire time I was having a hard time relaxing and enjoying my friends, because the commitment-phobe in me was losing her mind.
That night my friends were all going to a party on the east side, but I had already agreed to go to a costume party at the yacht club with the sailor. We left dinner and got to the yacht club, and I was in the company of mostly people over the age of 55 and his sister. So at this point, I'm basically on the verge of a panic attack realizing I turned down a party with my friends to do what this guy wanted to do on my birthday. All of his friends were super nice, and his sister complimented me up and down telling me how she was glad I was dating her brother and how she wanted to teach me to sail... so naturally, I requested that he bring me home immediately, not spend the night, and I broke things off the next day. I know, I'm a cold-hearted bitch, but it had to be done. As nice as he was, and as well as things were going, it didn't feel right. I told him I wanted to stay friends, which was true, but he wasn't into that. I understood and we didn't talk for a while.
We did remain friends on Facebook, I also ran into him randomly at Walgreens more than once. When he saw I was in a car accident this past May, he called me up to see if I was ok, which was really sweet. Soon after that, he had a change of heart about the friend thing and asked me to come to his company BBQ. I was grateful he reached out and wanted to rekindle the friendship, so I went. I had a great time, met some of his coworkers and friends, and gave his developer my card to help me with a few things on my website. When I met up with his 24 yr old coworker, I quickly realized he wanted more than a colleague relationship, and I'm pretty sure he told my sailing friend about his intentions. I was not interested in his coworker romantically, but I'm pretty sure the sailor didn't get that memo because we're back to non-friendly status once again. But hey, life goes on, and thankfully, I've got no shortage of friends. Also, the toolbox has come in handy many a times and I think back fondly on our time together every time I whip out that power drill.
Do you have any funny/awesome/awful dating stories?! I'd love to hear! Link to comment up top by the title!
ps. Photo cred goes out to my friend Megan from The Dinner Party Association!